At this moment in time, tensions in America are undeniably tense. It’s literally a matter of being cut off— a point where we are forced to decide to dismantle friendships simply because we don’t agree with the government party. But even in this clear societal line-in – the-sand era, I knew that friendships had to be there that stood the test of time, so I went on a hunt.
Well, to answer, you’d be surprised how hard it was to find authentic friendships between black and white women based on the criteria set for this article. And my search became so much more difficult with this criteria (feel free to email me if you want to know what the criteria was). We have a long way to go. Only remember. Finally, I noticed few queens willing to talk about their experiences when they sat down with us and rendered friendship about all issues.
Charliegh on friendship with Rachael told:
I met my best friend Rachel while I was at Florida nursing school. We wanted to carpool with somebody and it took us both a couple weeks to get going, because we were both reluctant. But we have been soul sisters from the very first ride. From these moments, years of drinking wine, eating doughnuts and being together foodies blossomed. Literally, Rachel is one of the greatest people I meet. She is compassionate and kind; she would do anything for her family and friends.
She always has a smile on her face no matter what the situation, and makes everyone around her laugh. She has pushed me through some really difficult times. From Grey’s Anatomy we name ourselves Grey and Yang. They’re always there for each other, no matter what, and they understand and respect the differences between themselves. To be sure, I grew up in a racist household, so Rachel and I definitely had a lot of discussion in the world today about racism.
Mostly about the various experiences she’d had and some of the stuff I’ve done. Thinking about it can be really tough at times, however important. The biggest lesson I’ve learned is we have to stand up for each other. Educate ignorant people, show people how the world can be if we have less hate. Stand up for the people we love, and honor and value all true friendships, and help other women in every circumstance.
Phoenix and Courtney told:
Phoenix and I met Big Green Foundation (co-foundedbyKimbal Musk, Elon Musk’s brother) at a function for the non-profit organization. We were attracted to each other’s personality automatically. Phoenix, more than most people I know, is very open and honest. We have a sense of frankness and comfort with each other which magnifies our friendship when it comes to advice and/or times when either of us can use emotional support.
We are both cheerleaders to each other. And of course we want to go out and get together for a glass of wine. What have I understood most about a black woman’s boundless friendship? It doesn’t matter what I suggest to her, she doesn’t seem disturbed by anything. She’s unfazed, resilient, and just continues to go. She has a different view on race issues and trained me and made me more informed.
It wasn’t until recently that I noticed she’s more honest with me than anyone else I know — which makes me more aware of how much that element is lacking in my other interactions with women. In friendships with other women, Phoenix has raised the standards for what I look for. Even the females with the most achievements have ups and downs. This friendship taught me to continue to get up even when you’re knocked down.
Jessica and Lovett said:
How do I really comprehend about the boundless love of a black woman? No matter what I say to her, she doesn’t seem distracted by anything. She’s unfazed, strong, and she just keeps going. She has a different view on race issues and has educated me and taught me well. It wasn’t until recently that I found she’s more straightforward with me than anyone else I know — which makes me more mindful of how much my other experiences with women miss that dimension.
Phoenix has lifted the bar for what I pursue in partnerships with other people. Even the most experienced females have ups and downs. This relationship inspired me to keep rising even when you’re not in your best state of mind.
Lulu and Lucy shared:
My LuLu is a force which is total. She is so pretty, so clever, so kind. An incredibly hard worker but also a great dancing buddy — we all love The Queen, Beyoncé! Anyway, Lulu and I really balance each other out and we have a lot in common, especially the fact that we both lived in our youth and as adults all over the world. We met in college. I chatted with our course director and Lulu popped in to talk about a podcast. I mentioned how much I loved podcasts and my extensive listening schedule and since then we have been friends. Getting a friend in NYC who thinks so close to you was very cool, particularly as an international student.
Kelly and Shawna told:
Shawna and I met through a boyfriend of mine. She was the most dedicated, goal-oriented, disney-loving, red velvet-obsessed, kindest, honest, fun-having person I had met. We’d go shopping for bathing suits, eat junk food together, go to Disneyland, dance the night away and be together with our family. I’ve been taught to push my other girlfriends to do their best and lift them up again and again when they’re down. Always always be there for them, like Shawna is for me. I had to try to change my outlook on how I connected and heard from the Black community as we got older. What I learnt from my friendship is that they often stand side by side, thick and thin.